Originally a born and raised Colorado girl, my transplantation to Texas has been interesting.
I am constantly asked why I would leave the snow, mountains, white water rafting, and cool weather for open plains, 100% humidity, and 75 degree "cool fronts".
The answer is pretty simple... A man. Yep, seriously. But not the way you think.
I've lived an interesting life...
I grew up in a difficult, although highly privileged, environment. No family is perfect, but ours seems to be a lot more messed up than most. When I was 15, I got in serious trouble with an Airman at the local Air Force Base, and I ran away from home.
I travelled the United States in an Eighteen Wheeler. And yes, I realize I am lucky to be Alive.
As a result of this escapade, the courts and my parents saw to it I was placed in Juvenile Detention Centers until I turned 18. That's where I got my real life education, and was subjected to experiences most people wouldn't believe. Trust me, the juvenile system needs fixed. Badly.
I got out, graduated as the valedictorian of my high school, got pregnant, married a military boy, and lived that life for a few years.
Then, things fell apart. The marriage didn't work for a lot of reasons, because of both me and him. Mostly, we were just too young and had way too much growing up to do, and as we did it was in different directions. But it was a nasty divorce, which ended with him disappearing and me raising my 2 precious boys on my own at the ripe age of 21.
So I became a single mom, struggling to make ends meet without child support as I finished school.
I also did the rebound relationship thing. Bad plan. He was abusive and cruel and destroyed my self-worth. And I put up with it. I still can't tell you why.
Fast forward 3 years. I was graduated, working, and still in that relationship. Oh, and miserable.
I randomly decided one day that I couldn't do it anymore. That I had to leave before he destroyed me and my boys.
24 hours later - I did.
I packed up my boys, the stuff I could take, and drove to Texas, where an awesome childhood friend of mine lived. We moved in with her and started our life over.
That was in August 2008.
In the past 8 years I've moved 7 times, finished my Master's degree, had some good and bad relationships, gotten in some trouble, got myself out, took a job as a CPA, learned how to love being single, and thought I was finally ready to put my heart out there again.
I got married in October 2013 to the man I thought I would be with forever. He was my whole world and healed me in ways I didn't know I could, or needed to, be healed.
I wish that this was a "Happily Ever After" story, where we ride off into the sunset.
But unfotunately, it's not. Life doesn't work that way.
The man I married became a person I didn't know. For a lot of reasons, no matter how much my heart loves this man, my head knows it's time to let him go. So, I'm in the process of divorcing a man who I am very much in love with, even now.
I'm rebuilding and resdiscovering myself. And I know I'll be ok. Because I always am.
So once again, I need to decorate my own soul instead of waiting for someone to bring me flowers. It's a process... feel free to follow along. It's kinda like therapy!